December 30

A photo taken late at night.

The ultimate liminal space. Christmas is and always has been a huge day for me, the crown of the year. I love the season, the closeness with family and friends, the feeling of giving.

And now it's over, and I'm old enough to be fine with that. Now we look into the new year, but...we're not there. Tomorrow is New Year's Eve, after that is 2020. But this is just a leftover day. It has nothing to do with this year, which really ended on Christmas Day. It has nothing to do with next year, which really starts on January 2, when I go back to work.

Dar Williams has a song called The Blessings that contains this haunting phrase:

And we sat down and we waited for that strange and empty light

Today is the day of that strange and empty light.

There is peace in it.